Friday, 24 August 2012

Day 12 - Gents of the Beige Variety



Before you read the full rambling thoughts below, I would like to warn any men reading this that you might find some of the following a tad abrasive or harsh. You are of course entitled to your opinions, but if you do find yourselves getting hot under the collar over words I’ve written- maybe this is how you act around women, or you say things like the examples I’ve given - then think of this as some tips. Tips on what not to say to get that hot, sexy lady you’ve been lusting over talking to you. Because this applies to any situation and otherwise she’ll think you’re a tool.

I had a couple of the ‘usual’ matches; guys who have totally different values and life goals. I say usual because it’s that time-old issue: out of everyone you will ever meet, date, kiss, befriend and/or do the horizontal bed dance with, you’ll only meet a select few with whom you really want to spend any amount of time. These guys in particular are ones who think keeping fit is a value.

Here’s the dictionary’s definition: (values) a person's principles or standards of behavior; one's judgment of what is important in life.

If someone claims that ‘keeping fit’ falls in line with that definition, then their priorities are so far out of whack, I would never be able to take them seriously.
AND – I’m not sure I should put this in but, well I’m going to anyway… Pretty much all these guys are actually a bit bland. For instance:

‘I am most passionate about balancing my career with my personal life’

What gibberish! Feel free to explain it to me, but how can anyone be passionate about that? It’s not an activity. That kind of sentence alerts the heterosexual woman’s internal idiot/player – radar. Mine was hooting madly 'Aroooooga!' and flashing blinding red police lights: At first I thought the man who wrote it was a bit of an imbecile, as you can see. Then my inner cynic/realist kicked in. I thought ‘this man, has written anything to try to get laid.’ I wonder how many women fall for it, because if mine’s the general reaction then he’s not doing very well. (Remember the guy who listed ‘poor grammar’ as something that would annoy him?)  Who wants to be thought of as first a moron, then a player?

The worst I’ve seen so far, reminds me of a prior housemate. He had a mild complaint of OCD and I nicknamed him ‘Dad’. It was a guy who listed cleaning as an activity that he enjoys. I think, perhaps rather prejudicially, I may have found the reason why some (I said some not all!) of these guys are using a dating website. 
They’re good on paper, but rather like your Nan’s beige house, after a while the lack of excitement gets a bit boring and you search for bolder colours. You can’t help losing interest in the same bland colour, you just do. And this isn’t mean, it’s just true.

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